The starting point of weight loss

It's my 42nd Birthday. No I'm not out at a party like I wish I could be. I'm sitting here thinking about weight loss goals and diet planning. I currently tip the scales at scales at 525 pounds. OMG how could I get this big.

I made a horrible mistake of confusing attention for love. In 2013, I connected with a man that was a feeder. This is a person that gets enjoyment out of watching someone eat. This is a person that enjoys larger women. This is a person who wants his woman to gain weight.

While our times together were enjoyable, I was blind to the fact that my health was getting worse and worse. I was allowing the life that I 
wanted for myself to slip out of my hands. A home body I am not. 
I want to be out experiencing life.

Today starts my weight loss and training program. I know that not every day is going to perfect. I am far from perfect. I know that I'm going to have some horrible days as I work towards taking this weight off.

One of the struggles of this diet is actually eating food. I tend to eat one major meal and then snack the rest of the day. Of course the snacks are not the healthiest things in the world. There are days when I'll eat one meal and then not eat for the rest of the day. I'm just not very good at planning meals.

I don't want to focus on numbers. I know that numbers are important. Yes, I want to be a smaller dress size and I want to be a smaller pants size.

The ability to experience life is so much more important to me.